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Dollars and Bonds: Helping Loved Ones




Lending money to friends and family can be a kind gesture when someone you care about faces financial challenges. However, it can lead to complications and disagreements if not handled wisely. According to a recent survey by Creditcards.com in 2022, 42% of respondents admitted to losing money when lending to friends or family.


If a friend or family member approaches you for a loan, it's crucial to keep these guidelines in mind.


Friend and Family Loans: When Do They Make Sense?


Certain situations may prompt a loved one to seek financial assistance from you. They might approach you for a loan if they:


  • Need urgent funds for unexpected expenses.

  • Lack a strong credit history to secure a traditional loan.

  • Don't meet income requirements due to illness or job loss.


While you may feel obligated to help, it's essential to assess how it aligns with your financial situation. If lending could strain your finances and disrupt your bill payments, it might not be the best choice. Conversely, if you have a healthy emergency fund, minimal debt, and a steady income, lending could be manageable.

Apart from financial considerations, evaluate the likelihood of repayment. If the person is responsible with finances and facing a one-time crisis, repayment may not be an issue. However, if they have a history of financial recklessness, lending carries more risk.



The Do's for Lending to Friends and Family


1. Lend Money to Trustworthy Individuals

When lending money with expectations of repayment, be discerning about your choice of borrowers. Only offer loans to friends and family you trust to honor their commitments. In a Lending Tree survey, over a third of participants reported negative consequences, including strained relationships.


It's perfectly acceptable to decline if you're uncomfortable with the idea of lending. Your primary concern should be maintaining a healthy relationship.


2. Limit Loans to Your Budget

Never extend a loan that jeopardizes your financial stability. Before determining the loan amount, consider it as a potential gift. In other words, only lend an amount you can afford to lose without causing financial strain.


This approach sets realistic boundaries and prevents you from needing financial assistance yourself later on.


3. Document the Agreement

When lending to friends or family, having a written agreement can prevent misunderstandings. Create a loan contract that both parties agree to and sign. Ensure it includes:

  • Names of the lender and borrower.

  • Loan approval date.

  • Loan amount.

  • Minimum monthly payments.

  • Due dates.

  • Interest rate (if applicable).

  • Consequences for default.


For substantial loans, consulting an attorney for contract drafting is wise. If interest is involved, adhere to Applicable Federal Rates (AFR) regulations, as interest on loans over $10,000 is taxable.


The Don'ts for Lending to Friends and Family


Don't Exceed Your Means

It may seem obvious, but it's worth emphasizing: never lend more money than you can comfortably afford. Overextending yourself can lead to financial problems if the borrower doesn't repay promptly.


Don't Let Guilt Dictate Your Decision

Avoid succumbing to guilt or pressure when considering a loan. If lending doesn't align with your financial situation, explore alternative ways to help, such as directing them to other available resources.


Avoid Sharing Your Credit



Rather than lending money directly, you can offer to co-sign a loan or allow them to use your credit card as a last resort. However, be aware that co-signing affects your credit score, and you're responsible for any credit card balances they accumulate.


Legality and Tax Considerations

Lending money with interest is permissible, provided it complies with legal interest rate limits. Most states have usury laws restricting the maximum interest rate. Additionally, familiarize yourself with Applicable Federal Rates (AFR) as interest rates below this threshold may be considered taxable gifts.


Intrafamily loans can also have tax implications. Loans exceeding $10,000 may incur taxable income from interest payments. Forgiving part of a loan or offering a below-market interest rate can result in gift tax obligations.


Why You Should Be Cautious About Lending Money to Loved Ones

Lending money can strain relationships, especially if repayment becomes challenging. The emotional toll can be more significant than the financial loss. It's often advisable to separate finances from family and friends. If you still choose to lend, be prepared for the possibility that the funds may not be returned.


In Conclusion


Balancing the desire to help loved ones with financial prudence can be challenging. While you may have resources to assist friends and family, lending money should not jeopardize your financial well-being. Consider these guidelines carefully when deciding whether to provide loans to those in your network.

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